UGH

Some days I just don't feel like a good mother.  This past several weeks I think its been most everyday. 

A couple weeks ago I woke up and couldn't go back to sleep...I laid there thinking about Landen and how amazing he is.  The first several years of his life I really missed out on that.  Being a young mom, although was the best thing that ever happened to me, had a lot of ups and downs. I wonder a lot of times if I did something wrong, if some of his "issues" are because I wasn't there for him, or because I did something wrong.  I know I will never know and that its pointless thinking about but it doesn't make me think any less.  As I laid there I started crying and no joke, Landen showed up.  He asked me if he could snuggle with me.  It was exactly what I needed at that moment to feel like I didn't screw up too bad and to hold onto my kiddo.

I love that boy.